First Steps as a Single Parent

Are you just starting out as a single parent? Do you feel completely lost? Completely alone? Don’t know how you are going to survive financially … or emotionally. Paralysed by fear?

I have done it, and you will survive.

The first thing I want you to do is take some deep breaths … ready ….

 

BREATHE IN …… HOLD …….BREATHE OUT

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BREATHE IN …… HOLD …… BREATHE OUT

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BREATHE IN …… HOLD …… BREATHE OUT

 

Ok so now that you have taken a moment to calm your nervous system, lets look at some simple things you need to do to get you started on this journey.

One of the first things you need to do is look at your main survival needs ~ Shelter, Food, Safety.  Do you have those in check?

First …

Shelter ~ This is somewhere safe to stay. With family or if you can secure a place of your own that is warm, clean and allows you do to the necessary thing you need and give you a feeling of “yes we have a roof” ok, I can move forward from here.

Next …

Food ~ Do you have some? Are you able to get some? As a new single parent finances can be quite tight, so relax your strict ‘we must eat this and we must eat that’ and cut your self some slack. Its not going to be forever (trust me), so get yourself some easy and affordable groceries that you can stretch out over a few days at a time. A good lasagne, spaghetti Bolognese. You get the idea. Be the mum you know you are and have always been, and make that kitchen work for you.

Next …

Safety ~ This is a must for all single parents. We need to feel safe and we need our kids to be safe. So no matter what you do, you need to be in a safe area. If that means you have to live with family for a while, even though it cuts into your independence and makes you feel immature and much like a failure. Do it! This is not as much about you as it is your kids. They come first, so pull up your big girl panties and get on with the job. They are family (or friends) and want to help you. And remember, like I said, it is not forever. It is until you get your head around what is happening, the changes you are experiencing at the moment, and until you create your plan of attack. e.g.. going back to work, etc, but that is a whole other blog. We will get to that.

For now though, these are your most important things to look at. Once you have those three very important things locked down, then you can take some time to look at your plan and work on the action you are going to take.

Remember, to allow friends and family to help you. Don’t be to proud to allow yourself to receive, there will be plenty of time to give back when you are ready.

So you have the first three things you need to focus on, this is your goal. Do your homework, use your intelligence, research, learn and trust that you have got this. You will be ok.

Justustwo xo

 

 

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